words cannot express...

Omegle 2

Are there really people like this in the US?

thong.

Dear girl wearing the orange thong,

                      Leggings are not pants.

                              

BEER

At my school, I am an elementary education major.  Today in my elementary ed class we started talking about our lesson plans and indiana state education standards.  The one I get to teach is about vowels and how different vowel combos can say different things (ex: Sky, high, bye...etc)  We then talked about how there isn't much rhyme or reason behind certain words like how tear can be said 2 different ways. Then some girl was like "or why the word Beer has 2 e's". my teacher then goes "Cuz beer is good." all our questions were answered.

bubble gum.

Blonde females should not be allowed to chew bubble gum and drive at the same time.

Pangea?

So I get up and go to my geology class today.  We are learning about plate tectonics and stuff like that.  and keep in mind this is a COLLEGE geology class where everyone is about 20 years old. The girl next to me starts looking at her book and stops on the page about Pangea.  She turns and looks at me and says with a huge sense of amazement, "NO WAY! THE CONTINENTS WERE ONCE CONNECTED?!"

I just stared at her.

Omegle 1

I love the site omegle.com. If you have never been there I suggest you try it. Pretty much you log on to it and choose whether you want video or text and it matches you up with a random stranger around the world for you to chat with.  I have very good luck of getting interesting conversations.  I will frequently post them when they are very funny or stupid. Here's the first one!

"You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

Stranger: You awake to find yourself lying on the ground. You cant seem to remember how you got there. As you struggle to pull yourself to your feet, vague memories of a falling rock come to mind. Gingerly, you touch the back of your head. The congealed blood on your hand confirms the memory.

You: did i die?

 Stranger: no

 Stranger: Looking around, you notice that you are on the edge of a steep cliff. To the south, the road is blocked by a pile of boulders. To the west, an unclimbable cliff rises up above you. To the east, the ground drops sharply away to reveal a tree-lined valley, miles below. The road to the north is clear. What will you do?

 You: is this like a choose ur own adventure thing?!

Stranger: yes, indeed

You: yaya ok lemme read it

You: what do u mean clear?

You: like nothing?

Stranger: yea

You: at all?

Stranger: nope

Stranger: just a road

You: ill take the east with the valley

Stranger: You stagger eastward. Examining the cliff wall to the west, you notice what appears to be a cave.

You: oooh a cave!

Stranger: will you enter it?

You: not without a flashlight.

Stranger: you have one in your backpack

You: when did i get a backpack?

Stranger: your backpack starts singing a song, naming everything in it

Stranger: backpack backpack backpack backpack

Stranger: im the backpack

Stranger: Loaded up with things and nick nacs too

You: this is a talented backpack.

Stranger: Anything that you might need I got inside for you.

Stranger: backpack backpack backpack backpack

Stranger: YEAH!

Stranger: it now stops singing and remains on your back

Stranger: now, do you enter the cave?

You: after taking out my flashlight sure

Stranger: You approach the cave and cautiously step inside. You can hear an odd noise.

You: is it a bear!?

You: do i have mace in my backpack?

You: my magical singing backpack?

Stranger: you have everything in there

Stranger: god, listen to the lyrics.

You: how am i still carrying it

You: haha

Stranger: its magic, dumbass.

Stranger: like mary poppin's bag

You: fuck yea.

You: ok continue

Stranger: you realise you have woken a hibernating bear. It is now a very awake, very hungry, very angry bear.

Stranger: The growling is getting louder. It is becoming a snarl.

You: i throw it a steak from my magical singing backpack of wonder

Stranger: it eats the steak and It is now even more angry

You: why? i gave him a steak. was it undercooked?

Stranger: overcooked, actually.

Stranger: he likes medium rare

You: well he should specify next time shouldnt he

Stranger: the bear takes a step towards you

Stranger: growling

You: i take out sleeping pills and stuff them in a medium rare steak

You: and serve it to him

Stranger: the bear eats the steak and falls asleep

You: yay!

Stranger: you realize the cave was a dead end

You: well that was a waste of time

Stranger: You make it back to the cliff path, but there are some disturbing noises coming from the direction of the cave. It might not be wise to hang around here.

You: run away!

Stranger: You head south, back to where you came from.

Stranger: You are on the edge of a steep cliff. To the south, the road is blocked by a pile of boulders. To the west, an unclimbable cliff rises up above you. To the east, the ground drops sharply away to reveal a tree-lined valley, miles below. The road to the north is blocked by the looming sillouhette of a very, very angry bear.

You: i would have headed west to get back to where i came from silly.

Stranger: i failed geography.

Stranger: :(

You: obviously

Stranger: >.<

You: why didnt i kill the bear while he was sleeping?

You: im sure i had a machete or something in my magical singing backpack of doom

Stranger: it wasnt necessary

Stranger: he's lazy and wont come back for you anyway

You: ok good

Stranger: which way will you go now

You: ok im gonna take the south

Stranger: you see a penny on the ground

You: is it heads up? 

Stranger: yes

You: ill pick it up.

Stranger: you reach to pick it up, and fall off the cliff

Stranger: You are falling though the air

You: but i pull a parachute out of my magical backpack

Stranger: it catches the breeze and slows your descent.

You: and because the heads up penny gave me luck it opens.

Stranger: Suddenly, a gust of wind catches your parachute and blows you towards a branch that is jutting out conveniently from the nearby cliff.

Stranger: You find yourself hanging by the leg from the branch.

You: how far is the ground

Stranger: far.

Stranger: With a sinking feeling, you hear the wood in the branch start to creak under the weight of the bear and you.

Stranger: oops

Stranger: lmfao no bear ^.^

Stranger: bears asleep

Stranger: you fall off the branch

You: bears not asleep

You: he was blocking the north path

You: so he woke up angry

Stranger: no?

Stranger: that was a new bear

Stranger: get with the program.

You: oh

You: ok im sorry

Stranger: forgiven.

You: so im falling again

Stranger: yes

Stranger: but then,

Stranger: it turns out your narrarator was wrong

Stranger: the ground was only 2 metres

Stranger: :)

You: and the narrator also cant spell

Stranger: you fall safely to the ground

Stranger: i failed english too.

You: lol

Stranger: To the east, you notice a phone booth.

You: oh yay!

Stranger: you decide to enter the phone booth. Looking around, you see a grimy telephone with a change return slot.

You: i pull hand sanitizer out of my magic backpack

You: and enough for a phone call.

Stranger: who will you call?

You: ghostbusters!

Stranger: they dont pick up.

You: well they are useless

Stranger: i suppose so

You: i find more change?

Stranger: and?

You: i call 911

You: i hope they pick up...

Stranger: they pick up

You: oh good

Stranger: you explain your story.

Stranger: It’s not long before you hear the whirring of the approaching helicopter. It whisks you away to safety.

Stranger: Congratulations, you have finished the game. You scored 100 out of a possible 100.

You: yay! i feel successful

Stranger: you celebrate by partying with the helicopter pilot

Stranger: :) Thanks for playing

You: dont give him anything to drink

Stranger: of course not

Stranger: Goodbye!

Your conversational partner has disconnected."

Here goes nothin.

Alright. so hello and welcome to my wonderful blog.  I will be recounting stories of interesting and ignorant people.  I won't be able to do this alone I'm sure, so I will always take your stories. I'll put up my email address so you can send me stories if you like. I will post them with your name or anonymously. I will frequently post random conversations from people I overhear. This should end up being an interesting one if I can get it up and running. lets make it happen.



If you have any stories you would like to post, please email me at Batteriesnotinc2@aol.com